..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Randomize
