let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
