is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
