my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
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