i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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