woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
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