in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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