apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
