Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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