considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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