capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
