I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
