I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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