I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Randomize