Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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