I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
