I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
