I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
