do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize