"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
