yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
we made out on top of his cat.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
