either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
