i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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