problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I don't deserve a penis
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Randomize
