Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
