you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Randomize