i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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