Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
