Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I just found puke in my bra..
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
