it was like his penis was on wheels.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Dignity is for republicans.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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