Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Randomize
