I am in a vortex of obligation.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
