We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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