Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
