Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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