i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
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