do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
