i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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