Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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