I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Randomize