Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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