and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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