why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Randomize
