Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
