What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
