you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
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