you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
