New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
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