i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
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