Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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